A smirk of the lips. A sigh of resignment. Or a nod of disbelief.
These are the frequent things you might face once you have a baby in your arms and you STILL say you want to go back to work! #JustIndianThings
Let's list the type of people you will meet when you try to squeak out that you want a job again, while the tiny one pulls at your breast hungrily.
1. The scandalized mother-in-law
This has to of course, be the first in a long list of people you will meet. She might be supportive but secretly scandalized or she might be plan angrily scandalized when you say this. Whichever way you put it, she is one of the first people to inform your husband that "The child is so small. How can she even find the heart to be so cruel"? while your husband puts up his feet on the sofa and breathes in the aroma of the biriyani wafting in from the kitchen. His laptop lies unopened, as he braces himself to prepare for the next day at work. Nobody questions whether he should go to work or not.
2. The well-meaning aunty
You sit demurely while the neighbourhood aunty gossips with your MIL about the disintegrating marriage of your mutual friend. You nod patiently, while hoping your baby gets a good rest today and takes a break from all the crying. The aunty chews the Marie biscuits loudly, and you stare at the lone particle stuck in her loud teeth. She guffaws loudly as she reminisces the constant fights she has heard between the couple and manages to aim the particle straight onto your forehead, oblivious. You wipe your forehead, disgusted and finally the conversation comes around to you. Her eyes round up like an owl, when she hears what you have planned. You get an earful of well meaning but secretly manipulative advices about why you are wrong, and she finally leaves after you are covered in a nice paste of spit and guilt.
3. The disapproving neighbourhood couple
You've seen them around the neighbourhood. The wife is always there to pack her husband off in the mornings with the tiffin. He moves on without a backward glance at her. She pretends she doesn't mind. He comes home at night, and you gawk at them through the window. He watches TV while she labours in the kitchen. You imagine the neglected wife having a secret affair with a guy she met on Facebook who showers her with the attention her own husband never gives her. You send a mental prayer to God Almighty for your own husband, who never fails to appreciate you and is the designated "vegetable chopper." of your house.
They end up visiting you and realizing your intentions of working again. All you see of them is their retreating back, as the husband shepherds the wife out the door hurriedly before you can corrupt her with your modern "feminist" ideas.
4. The confused husband.
Your husband loves you. He always has. He wants you to be happy, but he also wants to have a stable home with a good environment. He knows that two working professionals is better than one in this day and age. He also knows that a child needs his mother. He doesn't know what to say anymore, and he has decided to keep silent to avoid speaking on the subject at all. He knows the silence won't last long, but he vows to drag it out as much as he can. Your baby gurgles in his arms and your partner giggles, forgetting he was ever embroiled in this controversy in the first place.
5. The reluctant you.
You want your baby. You want your job. You constantly struggle between the two, but you can never make up your mind. You firmly advocate going back to work in front of society, because you know that the moment you weaken, they shall pounce on it and you won't ever see the inside of an office again for 5 years. But in private, you sit on your bed and look at your beautiful baby and wonder. You hope and pray you will be able to stay apart from her. You cry a bit, then look at her again. Do you want her to grow up, see you and feel like her mother didn't live up to her potential? OR do you want her to see you as a strong woman who faced the world for her, built a career AS WELL as took care of her?
You wipe off your tears, and shakily let out a breath as you prepare yourself for the world. You start accepting that no matter how much you love your child, being a mother alone won't make you happy. You need other aspects of your life to be full as well. And nobody will accept you unless you accept that part of yourself.
She offers you a faint giggle, as if she knows. You smile back fondly.
These are the frequent things you might face once you have a baby in your arms and you STILL say you want to go back to work! #JustIndianThings
Let's list the type of people you will meet when you try to squeak out that you want a job again, while the tiny one pulls at your breast hungrily.
1. The scandalized mother-in-law
This has to of course, be the first in a long list of people you will meet. She might be supportive but secretly scandalized or she might be plan angrily scandalized when you say this. Whichever way you put it, she is one of the first people to inform your husband that "The child is so small. How can she even find the heart to be so cruel"? while your husband puts up his feet on the sofa and breathes in the aroma of the biriyani wafting in from the kitchen. His laptop lies unopened, as he braces himself to prepare for the next day at work. Nobody questions whether he should go to work or not.
2. The well-meaning aunty
You sit demurely while the neighbourhood aunty gossips with your MIL about the disintegrating marriage of your mutual friend. You nod patiently, while hoping your baby gets a good rest today and takes a break from all the crying. The aunty chews the Marie biscuits loudly, and you stare at the lone particle stuck in her loud teeth. She guffaws loudly as she reminisces the constant fights she has heard between the couple and manages to aim the particle straight onto your forehead, oblivious. You wipe your forehead, disgusted and finally the conversation comes around to you. Her eyes round up like an owl, when she hears what you have planned. You get an earful of well meaning but secretly manipulative advices about why you are wrong, and she finally leaves after you are covered in a nice paste of spit and guilt.
3. The disapproving neighbourhood couple
You've seen them around the neighbourhood. The wife is always there to pack her husband off in the mornings with the tiffin. He moves on without a backward glance at her. She pretends she doesn't mind. He comes home at night, and you gawk at them through the window. He watches TV while she labours in the kitchen. You imagine the neglected wife having a secret affair with a guy she met on Facebook who showers her with the attention her own husband never gives her. You send a mental prayer to God Almighty for your own husband, who never fails to appreciate you and is the designated "vegetable chopper." of your house.
They end up visiting you and realizing your intentions of working again. All you see of them is their retreating back, as the husband shepherds the wife out the door hurriedly before you can corrupt her with your modern "feminist" ideas.
4. The confused husband.
Your husband loves you. He always has. He wants you to be happy, but he also wants to have a stable home with a good environment. He knows that two working professionals is better than one in this day and age. He also knows that a child needs his mother. He doesn't know what to say anymore, and he has decided to keep silent to avoid speaking on the subject at all. He knows the silence won't last long, but he vows to drag it out as much as he can. Your baby gurgles in his arms and your partner giggles, forgetting he was ever embroiled in this controversy in the first place.
5. The reluctant you.
You want your baby. You want your job. You constantly struggle between the two, but you can never make up your mind. You firmly advocate going back to work in front of society, because you know that the moment you weaken, they shall pounce on it and you won't ever see the inside of an office again for 5 years. But in private, you sit on your bed and look at your beautiful baby and wonder. You hope and pray you will be able to stay apart from her. You cry a bit, then look at her again. Do you want her to grow up, see you and feel like her mother didn't live up to her potential? OR do you want her to see you as a strong woman who faced the world for her, built a career AS WELL as took care of her?
You wipe off your tears, and shakily let out a breath as you prepare yourself for the world. You start accepting that no matter how much you love your child, being a mother alone won't make you happy. You need other aspects of your life to be full as well. And nobody will accept you unless you accept that part of yourself.
She offers you a faint giggle, as if she knows. You smile back fondly.
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